Thursday, March 29, 2012

color and growth


This morning I headed out to our usual Thursday thrift spot . While looking through the toddler shoes for Judah this woman next to us tried to touch his hand. I knew she was doing this because he was smiling, saying hi and frantically blowing kisses at everyone. I did what I normally do and pushed the cart a bit forward to "pretend" to look at something else to give the lady a "hint" to not touch my child. She got really offended, more so than any stranger in the past who has tried to touch Judah and she started to loudly announce to her friends and everyone with in earshot that I was a bad mom and that Judah and I are "dumb and dumber". I felt tears stinging my eyes and I wanted to tear her down verbally for saying those things about Judah and I. But instead I turned my back from her biting words and walked away to another part of the thrift store. This is huge as far as growth in my heart for me. You ask why. Well lets go back 10 years when I used to be a regular in the DC club scene, I know that if someone said something mean to me then, because it has happened, I would have had torn that person apart verbally till they felt like they were nothing. I hated that I was good at this and I would feel so much guilt after I would do such a thing. So 10 years ago after one particularly bad bar fight, I decided I needed to change. I don't want to verbally tear someone apart, I want to encourage and uplift someone. When that woman today verbally tried to humiliate Judah and I in the thrift store I thought, I can verbally attack her back and make her feel worthless in front of her friends and the customers. But if I did that she would probably get in my face, I would risk making my son feel fearful and unsafe and actually putting him in harms way because that woman was crazy enough to verbally attack me in the first place for me not wanting her to touch my son. I don't want Judah to feel unsafe or scared and I don't want him growing up to see his mama fight, verbally or physically. I don't want him to see that tearing someone apart is okay. So instead, I walked away. Although my heart was hurting and I just wanted to hide and cry from being hurt and humiliated, I knew it was best to walk away from the situation and from this crazy woman. And you know what, Judah didn't see his mama lose it, he saw me take the higher road. That's growth and that's teaching my son to do the right thing. This isn't the first time some stranger has acted a little odd after me moving Judah so they don't touch them, and I am sure it won't be the last. I mean how adorable is he?! If I saw him I would be drawn to him as well, then you add the sweet smiles and the blowing of kisses. I don't want to make him stop blowing kisses to people, its just his sweet little heart overflowing with love for other people. I don't want to take that from him. I want him to keep that part of him intact, I don't want it tainted.







When I did walk back to the area after the lady left. I did find the biggest bag of perfect vintage lace, maybe it was a hidden blessing for keeping my cool with the crazy lady. I'll be using this to wrap orders leaving my shop.



I decided during Judah's nap to organize all my yarn...by color! I still have more yarn upstairs that I have to organize.  Looking at all the pretty colors made me happy, and made me realize I need to brainstorm on ideas how to store all my pretty yarn. 


I organized all the gift tags for my shop. 


Then once Judah woke up we went outside to play with chalk and some balls I thrifted for him. He posed with his mustache and did a decent job of not eating to much of the chalk.


Awhile back I painted a bunch of mason jars that I am going to string up around my yard to hold flowers in (once my flowers start to grow a bit more). For now the jars make the perfect holding spot for the chalk. We may have to get more chalk at Target soon since we both like to color everything and Judah occasionally tries to take a bite out of them. 





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8 comments:

  1. I just wanted to tell you, You did the right thing!! That lady is the one who has to learn lessons. Everyone knows that now a days you just don't walk up and touch a baby. For her to lash out to you, is unbelievable. So sorry you had to go through that.
    I wanted to tell you that those jars are so cute! And I was thinking you could put little candles in them too, and have a romantic feel in your garden at night.
    You are a great mama!! <3

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    1. Denise the candle idea is a great idea!!! I am going to try that :-)

      Thanks for the encouraging words! I don't understand why she felt the need to lash out at me, it only confirmed I was right in not letting her touch my son because she was flat out crazy.

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  2. I'm so sorry that happened to you. You did do the right thing... and I can't imagine how hard it was. I probably would have lost it a little bit. People should know not to touch children they don't know and they should certainly know not to call someone they don't even know a bad mother or a call a baby dumb! That's just awful! Besides that, the lace is awesome. I'm a little jealous :)

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    1. The lace is amazing! It was such a good find! Thats the one thing I don't understand as a mom, is people trying to touch Judah. It really happens all the time. One time at Wegmans this lady tried to tickle Judah on his belly and Scott asked her not to touch him and she got offended....Im like really people do you want me to lift your shirt and tickle you? Its so weird.

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  3. I know it was so hard not to go bonkers on that lady! I commend you. Fourteen years in as a parent and unfortunately my kids have seen me lose it on people. :( Those are things in retrospect I wish I hadn't done and you won't have to feel that remorse. :) It is unreal how entitled people feel to touch others. Not just babies but hair and bellies and breasts and whatever strikes their fancy at the moment. The lace surely looks like a lovely reward for being upstanding and kind. I love the photo of Judah in his mustache coloring! lol So funny and cute.

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    1. Oh goodness, I've said some things before (not to that lady) but to other people I am not to proud of. Im sure that won't stop, especially when he goes to school. I just hope I can continue to keep my cool but I can't promise that you know what I mean :-)

      Yes people tried to touch me all the time when I was pregnant! I had these two women come up to me in Target one time (I was 8 months and very big) and they had their hands out like they were approaching me to touch my belly and one of the ladies before she touched me asked me "when are you due" and I said "what are you talking about" and she said "the baby when are you due" and I said "what baby Im not pregnant" their faces dropped and they apologized and quickly walked away, I had to go to the bathroom to laugh bc I thought I was going to pee my pants. I know its bad to lie. But I didn't want them touching my belly, and it was really funny

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  4. People are crazy. Why on earth would someone call a baby dumb???
    You are an awesome mommy for taking the high road and not tearing down that woman. Apparently she had something wrong with her mentally, I mean seriously to get THAT upset because you didn't want her touching your baby? Ridiculous!

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    1. I think thats why i was so upset, I am okay if someone says something about me, but Judah and calling him dumb, I was thinking why in the world did you even want to touch him in the first place if you thought it was so dumb. But hopefully we won't ever bump into her again. She wasn't very nice and yes I don't get people trying to touch Judah, it happens ALL the time

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Thank you for your comments! They encourage my heart and I read every single one of them. Please be encouraging and don't just comment or email me when you want to correct me on my grammar. When I get the "grammar correction" emails or comments they do hurt my feelings. I wouldn't want your heart to feel the way mine does after reading them.

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