Kindred Spirits and playing nice in the blogging world
The friendships I've made in the blogging world are on my heart daily. I became involved in the online community over 10 years ago when I joined a list serve called DCraves. When I was younger I loved the club scene and I love meeting new people. When I was in this community a bunch of us started live journals and we would talk about our daily lives, what made us laugh, wrote out party reviews, upcoming meet ups and uploaded allot of pictures. Every Monday morning people would email out their weekend review on which parties they attended with shootouts. It was something that was fun to us, we were not trying to "become famous" we all knew each other. I ended up leaving the club scene and started a wordpress journal. On this journal I spoke about my relationship with the Lord, how I started working at McLean Bible Church, my heart breaking while I stayed with children living in the garbage slums in Cairo, my journey with being a student leader with the High School and Jr High Students, people walked with me through my breakup of of my last boyfriend, witnessed my journey of meeting my husband, my social media community was the first to know when my husband proposed to me in the butterfly exhibit in DC (yes I immediately tweeted and updated my Facebook), I made sure we had an "open potluck wedding" so I was able to invite all these people who have impacted my life and we had a little over 350 people show up. These friends have walked with me, knew the heartbreak and trauma of my childhood, how much I wanted to become a mother and not be my mother and I was struggling with being pregnant. They know the day I became Judah's mom changed my heart, I wrote out that the moment I held my son I knew he was a gift. I've made some pretty close friends in the blogging world. But I've also had my blog used against me. I had a few "mean girls" twist my words on my blog and throw them in my face. My husband has seen my heart break, has hugged me when I couldn't stop crying over "mean girls", he was there when I decided to delete my live journal and make my wordpress private. Years of written memories hidden now from the world because someone used them to break my heart.
I don't understand the blogger meanness, I saw it in the DCraves, live journal and wordpress communities and I see it now. Everyone has a different blogging styles and they share differently. Honestly if we were all the same I would just get bored with reading blogs. I'm a mama to a very active toddler and some days I only have time to read a few sentences and look at a photo dump of IG pictures. Other days when Judah is napping I have time to read long well thought out posts. I want to get to know my friends, I get excited to read the stories, I want to celebrate with what brings you joy and and my heart empathizes with what hurts yours. Your blog help me know you more. But it hurts my heart when I read a post that someone has made talking about how they don't like different blogging styles, but what hurts my heart more is when they actually raise their blog up to be better than the person they are referring to. You really can't write that post that makes your blog look better than another in a non offensive way, if you have readers then someone may just have the writing style that may annoy you. Its okay if you don't care for a certain writing style, just don't publicly share that information or dedicate blog posts on hurting another blogger. Keep it in your heart and know that its just a personal preference. If you feel like it still bothers you and you just want to vent to the world about it, then read another blog that doesn't make you want to bash another blogger for their writing style. The writing style of that blogger that annoys you so much, may be the only style they feel comfortable with right now. I was transparent on my live journal and wordpress and I was hurt a little over a year ago by some "mean girls" and right now my photo dump of my son is what I am comfortable with. I'm slowly getting around to really sharing my heart, but I'm not going to stop posting pictures of my son.
I personally know in this online world you will meet a few people who will hurt your heart. You will also meet people that you knew you were always supposed to be friends with and by chance you happened to meet on Twitter, IG or stumbled upon their blog. These are kindred spirits of the blogging world. These sweet kindred spirits make the occasional social media heartaches worth it. I love that my husband knows of my online mamas, that I get to exchange Christmas, Valentines day and Birthday cards. My social media support has encouraged me to take steps of faith in opening my business "My Charming Colors"and I've had several mamas encourage me to try crocheting something that I thought I couldn't do. These are friends that my heart wishes they lived closer so I can go meet up at Starbucks, go on thrift adventures or have play dates with our kids. These ladies are the first to celebrate with me when I'm having a great day or when something amazing happens in my life and they are also the first to respond when its not so good. They fight for my friendship and heart like I fight for theirs. Its something worth fighting for and a friendship worth investing in.
In keeping up with an old DCrave tradition....I will share with you some shootouts of some of my favorite blogs, ones that are dear friends and others that just make my heart happy.
I have a huge blog list I read, but right now these are the ones that I currently find myself commenting on, getting lost in the pictures or the words, being inspired by and truly building friendships with some of these lovely bloggers.
I hope in no way anyone took this post as an attack, believe me I am guilty as the next person for wanting to publicly vent about things But when it comes to bloggers, I just feel that our bond is somewhat sacred and we should be encouraging each other instead of tearing each other down.
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